


Don't Misbehave

by MonoRose



Category: Banana Bus Squad
Genre: Actually Don't Read This, Aftermath of Torture, Aftermath of Violence, And As An Outlet For My Own Troubled Mind And Past, Angst, Anyways Back To Tags..., Bad Guy Is Just Kinky AF, Dark, Except Bryce Is Clearly Not Into It, Explicit Rape, Gang, Gang Violence, Graphic, Humiliation, Hurt, I Actually Really Love You And Would Never Wish This Upon Anyone Ever, I Am Terrible™, I Just Sinned, I Just Used You As A Fictional Persona, I Literally Asked To Do This Though, I Will Be Posting This Every Monday, I'm Sorry Bryce, Kinks, Kinky, Looks More Important, M/M, Master/Pet, Mental Breakdown, Mental Instability, Multi, Not In a Good Way - Freeform, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Rape/Non-con Elements, Someone Else Gave Me The Ideas, The First Part Is Literally 15 Pages Alone, Then 50 Pages Later..., There Will Be Three Parts, This Is Terrible™, Unsanitary, Until I Run Out Of Shit, Why Am I Capping Every Word Stop This, bad, explicit - Freeform, fictional characters, good ending, i hate myself rn, no bueno, non-con, this was supposed to be a one-shot, vulgar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-17
Updated: 2017-01-25
Packaged: 2018-09-18 03:34:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 21,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9366266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonoRose/pseuds/MonoRose
Summary: When Bryce's little brother joins a gang, he tries to talk him out of it without any success, so opts to join the gang with his brother in order to protect him.Little did he know he would need protecting.(NOT A CHEESY AND VAGUE SUMMARY AT ALL. NOPE. BUT AYE MAMA ROSE IS KIND OF BACK???)





	1. Round One

**Author's Note:**

> So I didn't want to post this until I was either finished with this, or had a good bulk of this written before hand. It ended up being the latter. 
> 
> Here is a little insurance for myself, just in case so bear with me: I used this as an outlet, and I need to remind everyone in this fandom of something. When I write anything, it is NEVER ill-intended towards the actual people I write about. I never literally expect any of my ships to happen, and I would NEVER dream this upon anybody. EVER. So don't go thinking I do. Please. This is a manifestation of Bryce's personality put into a fictional work. I will put this down if need be.
> 
> Also, I will be posting other fanfictions as soon as I can. I just needed to write some dark shit since I am in a dark place myself. I want to thank Yishy for being my beta and dealing with me digging myself into writer pits. Seriously I am so good at doing that. Thank you so much for your help.. (And the idea but ya KNOW)
> 
> I am sorry, but hope you enjoy anyways. If you wanted more dark shit, comment and kudos on this and tell me some ideas. (I am more than happy to be that Asshole™)

Silhouettes of buildings and trees whizzed over the striking colors that were flushed across the sky in an array of gradients. The wind playfully swatted Bryce’s hair into his eyes, the windows of the car rolled down all the way as music blared deafeningly through the speakers. Bryce glanced over at Damien, his own hair shaved at the sides and buzzed short at the top, his worn out jacket too big for him and his old shirt was a mess. It was no surprise that his brother was singing at the top of his lungs, though his voice wasn’t heard over the rock music he had playing.

Bryce sighed, leaning across the center console to turn the music down, and he glared at Damien when he smacked his hand away from the knob defiantly. 

“Damien!” Bryce shouted with a pout, his voice easily drowned out by the music. He tried again to turn the music down, this time succeeding so that the blare of guitars, drums, and rough voices were just a light buzz in the background.

Damien sulked, glancing over at Bryce with a dirty yet amused look, “What is it Bryce?” He asked a little snarkily.

“We have to talk about this.” Bryce stated firmly, determinedly sticking his chin up in the air.

“What’s this exactly??” Damien asked with a raised eyebrow, clearly getting a kick out of being a smartass. Clearly it came naturally for him.

An aggravated sigh passed through Bryce’s lips before he pushed at the subject, “We have to talk about being in this gang Damien! It’s so stupid! It’s dangerous and you can get hurt. You need to get out of it. I don’t even understand why you even joined in the first place.”

Damien scoffed, rolling his eyes as he scolded Bryce back, “Well you never needed to join. You can get out if you want, though it’s probably too late for us both to do that.”

“This isn’t a game! This isn’t a movie or anything remotely like that. This is real, and you can't keep doing this. Y-You need to get your life together and live it normally. And you know that I only joined because I wanted to look after you.”

“Well  _ Mom _ , I am a grown ass man and I never asked for you to babysit me. In fact, I’d prefer it if you would get out.” Damien snapped.

Bryce bit at his lower lip, feeling his anger boil. It was the same argument every time. And every time, he would lose. Because Damien was right. He didn’t need to be there. And he couldn’t do anything about Damien’s life choices. 

“Why do you want this so badly? What’s so appealing about this to you?” He asked, breaking the pattern that they had both seen in this fight, surprising Damien.

The shock initially wore off though, because soon his brother was back to his cool self, shrugging it off as he looked forward, “It’s better than having the same life as everyone else. Having a boring office job and bland friends, and shit pay. You get nothing out of fitting in. Besides, makes life more fun, risky… You wouldn’t get it Bryce. You’ve always been too cautious and have easily fallen into the norm you were given.”

Bryce sighed dejectedly. He didn’t get it at all, and he felt as if his brother was patronizing him for that. Making him feel stupid for not wanting to die, how dumb was that.

They rode in silence for a few more moments, until the radio was turned up again, loud music filling the silence of the car up.

 

\---

 

The jingle of keys and the wheeze from the engine of the car broke Bryce out of his trance. His brother was already out of the car, broadly walking through the dust and towards the building that stands sadly before them. Bryce frowns as he exits the car, scuffling through the dirt and following his brother to the abandoned warehouse, the metal sheets falling apart and rusting, several layers of paint chipping off of the metal, the entire place worn down and nearly caving in.

They entered the building, seeing other members in there, talking amongst each other silently as they waited on the man in charge of the entire organization to enter. It wasn’t too long until he was there, walking in with his weapon clearly in hand, his jaw set high with pride. 

Bryce had never liked their boss, Travis. Not a big surprise, nobody liked their boss. But there was something about the way the man held himself that always made Bryce feel unsettled. Specifically, the way he looked at Bryce made his skin crawl… He shook his head of such thoughts and brought his attention to what it was the man was saying. 

Glancing over at his brother, he knew that Damien was paying much more attention than he was. Something about a drug deal this weekend, how they would need to keep their guard up and have backup just in case of something going wrong. It was really the usual. Normally things didn’t go wrong because the other gang wanted their money, and theirs wanted the drugs. Those transactions never played out smoothly, but they commonly ended up alright in the end. So Bryce didn’t really find himself caring enough to paying attention to every little detail that was spoken in Travis’ scratchy voice.

So when Travis was calling his name, Bryce startled upright and stared at Travis without any understanding of what the context was. 

“What?” He asked thinly, getting nervous by all the eyes that were now trained on him. Bryce hated to be the center of attention, unlike Damien who thrived in it. He tried to be low-key in the gang, though it always seemed as if Travis had to go and thrust Bryce into the spotlight despite his attempts.

Travis shook his head with a little sigh, causing Bryce’s face to heat up with embarrassment as everyone else seemed to judge him on the spot. His brother’s eyes were sympathetic as he looked at him. “I was asking you to tell me where we are going to perform the transaction this weekend Bryce. You need to pay attention, this is really important. I mean this could be life or death, and you’re standing over there with a head full of air…” Travis huffed.

Bryce lowered his head, trying not to draw more attention to himself than he already had, “Alright, sorry Travis… I’m not sure what you said.”

He heard the man hum before he answered, “I said we were gonna be meeting up with the other gang at the pier. You with me Mr. McQuaid?”

He nodded, looking down at his shoes with shame, “Yes, sir.” He felt like he was being lectured by his teacher in elementary school all over again, or even being talked down to like he was a mutt. His gut twisted with a nasty feeling he couldn’t quite describe.

“Good. Now moving on….”

After a few hours of planning and discussing things Bryce had no interest in, though he did try his best to stay alert and give his full undivided attention to everything that was said, Travis finally told them all to go get some rest for the upcoming event. Bryce was eager to get home, he excitedly followed Damien to the car with thoughts of his lovers in mind when a sharp voice broke him away from those fantasies.

“Wait Bryce. I would like to have a word with you in private.” Travis barked from the doorway of the warehouse just as Bryce had settled his hand on the cold metal of the car door that led to his freedom.

He hesitated, looking up at Damien who merely shrugged and got into the car to wait for him. “McQuaid, right now. I don’t want to ask again.” Travis snapped, which caused Bryce to immediately turn around and walk back to the warehouse. He tried very hard not to let himself sulk as he followed Travis quietly.

Everybody else had gone already. It was only Bryce and Travis, and Bryce was just happy that Damien was waiting outside for him. He got an uneasy feeling in his gut about being alone with his boss. It was no surprise that he felt such a way when the man was firmly holding a gun in his lap as he sat down in an old chair that had been in the warehouse.

“Wh-”

“Don’t speak unless I tell you to Bryce.” Travis sighed in annoyance, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Bryce shut his mouth, pressing his lips together tightly in a thin line. He didn’t understand why Travis was picking on him so much today, but he decided not to worry about it. It would only be a few minutes and he would be allowed to go back home to Luke, Ryan, and Jon… Ahh the thought of that was rewarding in itself.

“Sit down.” Travis ordered, gesturing to the dirtied concrete floor. A sly smirk playing at his lips as his dark eyes bore into Bryce.

Of course, Bryce hesitated, his eyes going back and forth from his boss and to the floor, before seeing that Travis’ eyebrows were raised expectantly. He decided not to piss him off again, and slowly brought his long figure to sit on the floor. He felt too small with Travis sitting up in the rickety chair as he sat on the floor, but he didn’t say anything.

Travis leaned forward in the chair, until his face was directly in Bryce’s. Bryce flinched away when Travis’ hand came towards his face, and was startled when the man firmly grabbed at his jaw. Travis laughed at him, smiling widely, “Did I scare you sweetheart?”

Bryce felt his face flush, though he merely scowled at the man before him. He would have stood up right there if it wasn’t for the gun that now was placed snugly on Travis’ lap. Of course, Bryce had a handgun, but that wouldn’t do him much good when it was tucked away in his pocket while Travis had his assault right out in the open.

Besides, he didn’t want to end up killing a gang leader and being wanted by everyone.

“Listen here, you need to step up your game Brycey. You’ve been slacking a lot in any activity that we’ve had the last couple of months. So, I need you to come into the barn tomorrow night and get some training in. Alright?”

Bryce bit down his protests. It’s not like he wanted to be here anyways, it wasn’t fair. He nodded, only remembering belatedly that he and his boyfriends had promised to watch a movie together tomorrow night. He frowned upon the realization, but didn’t let it show too much.

“Good. I will see you then, hmm?” Bryce felt a shiver go down his spine as Travis caressed his cheek gently, a strange look heavy in his eyes. 

Bryce quickly nodded again, a small, “Yes, sir,” tumbling out of his mouth before he could stop it. 

“I look forward to our session tomorrow,” Travis nearly purred, standing and holstering his gun up with him. “You can leave now.”

Bryce gratefully got up to leave, rushing over to the entrance of the door before Travis’ rough voice halted him once more, “And Bryce?”

“Y-Yes?” He asked, slowly turning around to look at the man. 

“Don’t bring Damien with you. I want you to come alone.”

Bryce nodded for the umpteenth time that night, before he was waved off. He quickly made it to the car before he could be stopped again, and was relieved to see that Damien was still waiting for him in the driver’s seat, playing some game on his phone.

“Finally, jesus, what did he want?” Damien asked with a sly look.

Bryce shrugged, looking and sinking into his seat, looking out the window. “Just get me home,” He muttered silently.

 

\---

 

Bryce tried not to be unusually quiet that night at dinner, he tried to smile and laugh when Jonathan and Luke flicked spaghetti meatballs at one another playfully. He nodded absent mindedly as Ryan spoke about his day at work, complaining about his coworker calling in sick and embarrassingly admitting that he had spilled his hot coffee all over himself. But Bryce couldn’t pull his mind away from that day and what had happened with Travis.

“You alright Bryce?” Luke asked with a raised brow, his look burning into him with a skeptical stare.

Bryce nodded quickly, a wide smile spreading across his face, “Yeah sorry.” He frowned when he remembered that he couldn’t spend time with his lovers tomorrow, “Uhm, I got some bad news though… I gotta go to work tomorrow night.” He muttered quietly, feeling a guilty pit forming in his stomach. 

He always felt bad when he mentioned work. Because his boys didn’t know what he was actually doing of course. It would put them in a dangerous position, and they would be pissed at him for doing such a stupid thing. They all thought he was working retail, which wasn’t surprising given that he hadn’t gone to college and retail was known for it’s odd hours. He felt bad for lying, but he didn’t want to make them vulnerable to his situation. It was bad enough that Damien had thrust himself into such a lifestyle with no regards for his own safety.

He watched as his boyfriends’ faces all fell, before they quickly picked themselves up with understanding smiles and a caring twinkle in their eyes. Bryce really didn’t deserve just one of them, not to mention all three. 

“It’s alright Brycey, we can plan it for another night!” Jonathan stated gleefully, his smile broad and his eyes bright and warm. 

Ryan slurped up a noodle before nodding his head in agreement, “Absolutely, it’s alright. I am really proud of you for picking up more hours at work, sweetie. I know it’s been really taxing on you at times. But you are doing really well.”

Bryce smiled gratefully at them both, and Luke gave his hand a reassuring squeeze underneath the circular table. “We’ll all live baby. Another time for sure.”

Dinner was done, and Bryce volunteered to do dishes. Of course, he had to get into a heated argument with Jonathan over it, but he finally won by telling him he just wanted to think and doing dishes helped him do it best.

Besides, within moments, he was humming happily as he listened to the murmur of voices float into the kitchen from the living room lightly. His train of thought had finally steered away from work and warped it’s way around his lovers. 

He dried his hands from the sudsy water once he was finished, and heard Luke and Ryan speaking to one another on the couch. Jonathan must have gone into the bathroom because soon enough the shower water was running, despite the fact that Bryce had just gotten finished with the dishes. 

Bryce walked into the room, smiling gently as he watched Luke cup Ryan’s chin in the palm of his hand sweetly, leaning in to peck at his lips a few times as Ryan’s eyes fluttered shut, content and happy. 

They both looked up and smiled at Bryce, scooting away from one another and inviting Bryce to sit between them. Before he had met these men, Bryce had never liked a lot of attention to be drawn to him. He had always been a very selfless lover and never enjoyed being doted on… Then again, he had also only dated girls and never understood why any man particularly would like to be cared for in such a compassionate and endearing way… He understood why now.

Bryce sat in between his lovers, giggling as Luke nibbled at his red ears a little bit, and  beaming as Ryan slung his arm snugly around Bryce’s waist. 

He understood now why people craved attention so dearly, why they loved to be cared for just as much as they enjoyed caring for others. He ran a hand through Ryan’s locks of hair before grazing his lips over the stubble on his jaw, kissing at the hinge of it. Bryce got why people loved to nuzzle into these hot touches and drowned themselves in sweet words, trying hard not to let the meaning slip through their fingers like water. He leaned back into Luke’s chest as he felt him wrap himself around Bryce like a cocoon, and he smiled and laughed some more as Ryan leaned into them both, kissing them both gently on the lips.

Since he had met his lovers, he understood what was so wonderful about being in such a healthy relationship, where one would give and another would take in equal amounts. They all laughed as Jonathan pounced on their little group, his hair still matted to his forehead and dripping wet, whining about how they were going on without him. Pouting until they were all clinging to him and kissing his lips, his nose, cheeks, shoulders, and neck. Hysterical laughter erupted from all parties as they wrapped themselves around each other lovingly, all protective and all loving of one another.

Bryce smiled as he lied in bed with his lovers, curling up behind Jonathan warmly as his arms stretched out to reach Ryan’s hand, that happened to be enclosed by Luke’s. Their warm breaths all mingled together, and the gentle hum of their hearts buzzed through the air and sent a delightful tingle down Bryce’s spine.

Sleep dawned on him sooner than expected, his mind and his body wrapped up in the eternal warmth of his lovers.

 

\---

 

He catches every little detail this time around, every word that slips from Travis’ lips, making sure not to forget a syllable that is said. It doesn’t mean that Bryce is enjoying himself however, as Travis and a few of the higher level and more ‘respectable’ members of the gang explain the strategy and the plan of the drug deal, specifically covering what would go down if anything went wrong, yada yada yada. Bryce could care less.

It takes forever, but finally Travis dismisses everybody, luckily without humiliating Bryce this time. However Bryce does fluster when the man catches his eyes and winks at him with a sly smirk. Bryce follows his brother out to the car, outside a different place than yesterday, some abandoned bar downtown. 

“You alright Bryce?” Damien asks, concern clear on his face. Even though Bryce’s little brother could definitely be a brat, he was still his brother. And they did genuinely care about one another despite all of their differences. 

Bryce smiled tightly, nodding. He didn’t want to accidentally let it slip that he was going to be training with Travis in an hour, that he really didn’t want to and that he was scared he was going to mess up. He really didn’t want to admit that he hated being in this gang and he didn’t want to get onto his knees and just plead while weeping for Damien to stop being so idiotic.

So Bryce kept his mouth shut until Damien finally drove him to his house, which stood empty without any of his lovers home. All of them busy at work or what have you. Bryce waved at Damien as he drove off, and sighed a breath of relief as he entered the house. It was too quiet and too barren, which unsettled him. 

He began to get ready, deciding it was safest to exchange his shitty handgun for the well kept one that Luke always had in the holster underneath his desk. Bryce knew that Luke would knew as soon as he saw it, but he also decided that he wasn’t going to find out. It was just for safety measures.

Of course Bryce knew it was sketchy that Travis was asking for him to go to the isolated barn alone with him. He knew that it was terrifyingly suspicious that he was told not to bring Damien with him, and that he was told specifically to come alone. Especially considering the creepy interactions from yesterday and the past nine months he had been in the gang.

But Bryce didn’t have much of a choice considering he was unfortunately in this stupid gang, and that he didn’t want to blow his cover. Or ruin anything for Damien. 

Besides, he was just going to be training. And if anything went south, Luke’s gun was securely placed in the holster Bryce had around his waist. If worst came to worst…

Before he knew it, Bryce was getting out of his car, shutting the door firmly behind him as he looked around. The barn was barely lit up by the now set sun, far too low underneath the horizon at this point. The area was indeed desolate, surrounded by nothingness, and beyond that, glimpses of cornfields stretched out farther than Bryce could see.

A warm sigh was blown into the chilly air as Bryce scuffled his shoes along the gravel that led up to the rotting barn. It had been left to stand on it’s own decades ago, and it showed in the splintered and molded wood, the creaking rusty hinges of the doors, and the way the building seemed close to crumbling in on itself. Bryce frowned as he approached the door to it, which groaned hoarsely despite his attempts to softly open it.

The soft light from outside trickles into the barn through the cracks, and Bryce has to adjust his eyes to the darkness that shrouds the barn. He follows along the wall of the building, until he finally finds what he is looking for, a light switch. It’s a little tough to push upwards, but when he finally does, Bryce startles at the sudden sound that booms across the barn. His heart rate calms down as all of the lights groggily flicker on and create a dim glow across the barn.

There are stables, and rusted fences and gates. Old bales of hay sit in moist corners, decaying and full of musty mold that has grown over it for years. Bryce whips his head around suspiciously when the groaning floorboards of the barn echoes around him. He begins to slowly walk forward, away from the entrance until he is standing in the middle of the barn, eyes cast up at the lights that hang overhead with the lightest swing from the outside wind that sneaks in. 

“Travis?” He calls out, though he was beginning to doubt that the man would have been standing in the darkness of the barn waiting for him. Bryce’s lips twisted into a frown as he called out his boss’ name again. Did he go to the wrong place? But what other place would Travis mean by the barn, this is where they would usually meet up if he wanted the group to meet at the barn… Bryce sighed as he doubted himself again, he must have heard it wrong. Or maybe he didn’t hear what Travis had actually said. After all, he hadn’t been paying attention to anything that day before that.

Bryce slumps over dejectedly, not sure what to do with himself now. The boss would be pissed at him once he realized Bryce wasn’t coming. He just hoped that he wouldn’t get into too much trouble. Bryce begins to walk back toward the entrance of the barn, about to head over to the light switch when he heard the shifting of gravel from behind him.

Before Bryce could react and turn around to see the source of the noise, he feels something slam against his back harshly, and he is on the ground, his arms twisted behind his back roughly as he wheezes and coughs.

“Awh, you came! Oh Bryce, darling, I am so glad that you could make it.” A husky voice cooed into his ear, the breath too hot and the sound too close. It was too familiar. Frighteningly so.

“Ge-Get off of me!” Bryce coughed out, trying to get the dust out of his lungs as his face was pressed into the gravel sharply. 

Bryce squirmed when he felt hands on his waist, and he gasped when Luke’s gun was found, immediately taken out of the holster. “What’s this now? A gift? Why Bryce, you shouldn’t have.”

He was finally flipped over until he was looking up at none other than Travis. His arms were pinned behind him painfully, and he was held in place as Travis was digging one of his knees into the center of Bryce’s chest, as he toyed with the beauty that was Luke’s gun playfully.

“Travis- What are you doing? Get off of me!” Bryce yelled, his voice high pitched and panicked as he wiggled uselessly underneath the man’s weight.

Travis was one of the few people who was taller than Bryce, only by a couple of inches, though it still did make a difference. Not to mention the man was quite hefty compared to the stick of a man Bryce was. His weight was much bulkier and it showed in the immediate situation Bryce found himself in right now.

“Bryce, I don’t think I’ve ever told you this but… I’ve always adored you, always known that you were the most beautiful thing I would set my eyes on, and I can’t fucking help it anymore, I want you. I want your body too damned much, you’re such a tease.” Travis purred, leaning in close to Bryce’s face, his hazel eyes seemingly absorbing every detail of Bryce’s face. 

“No no- Get off- Travis I don’t want anything like that- Pl-” Bryce stammered before wet lips were pressed against his own, taking him by such a surprise that he didn’t even register what had happened until a hot and slimey thing was violating his mouth greedily. Bryce was taken aback by the feeling of Travis’ scratchy goatee scraping across his jaw, his face much too close for Bryce’s comfort. Everything was becoming too much too fast.

He didn’t kiss back, but he didn’t struggle either, too stunned by the fact that it was happening at all that he couldn’t bring himself to.

When Travis finally pulled away from him, saliva dripping down his chin in a disgusting manner, and Bryce finally broke out of his shocked trance. He was glaring at Travis entirely now, angry words were suddenly twisting out of his mouth in a way he didn’t think was possible, “What the hell??? What was that? Get off of me right now! I said I don’t want anything like that with you!!! Now listen to me and let me go!”

Bryce yelped when Travis quickly brought a hand to his face, flinching in fear of being hit. Instead, his cheek was cupped much too gently, his face angled so that he was looking up at those hazel eyes that reminded him too much of a person he referred to as home. Black jet hair was curling from his head in messy waves in such a familiar way, and the facial hair didn’t help at all to remind him of people he loved too dearly.

A sharp feeling settled in his gut when Travis smiled proudly. “Travis- Seriously this isn’t funny, just get off of me and let me go home!” Bryce tried again to struggle, though by now he couldn’t even feel the arms pinned behind his back, they were numb from the weight that was holding them down. 

“What don’t you get about me wanting to make you mine, wanting to take your body? I can’t control myself anymore- You’re just so beautiful. Your eyes, your hair, your lips, your body, oh god I’m sure that you have a nice little ass too hmm? Just perfect for me to fit into.”

Bryce shook his head feverishly, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. There was no way this was happening. This was just some fucked up nightmare that he was having, he was going to wake up and be curled up around Jonathan. Maybe Luke would be wrapped around Bryce, and Ryan sprawled across the three of them clumsily. Everything was going to be okay, this was not real. Wake up Bryce.

But he didn’t wake up. Because this was not a dream.

“Please, please don’t- I just want to go home…” Bryce pleaded, his voice cracking as Travis looked down at him with a broad smile. He looked too pleased with himself.

Travis didn’t respond to him, instead standing up over Bryce. Bryce tried to be quick, sitting up though he couldn’t exactly get his arms to cooperate with how little feeling he had left in them. So he used his legs instead. He tried to scamper away from the man, though was easily hauled up until he was thrown over Travis’ shoulder.

Bryce didn’t want to seem desperate, but he was. So he began to kick and scream, flailing his arms uselessly as he pounded his shoes into the man’s stomach to no avail. Despite knowing that the building was out in the middle of nowhere, knowing that nobody would hears his cries for help. He whimpered when he was thrown onto something that felt mushy. With a sickening realization, he understood that he had been put onto one of the rotting piles of hay. 

He cried out when Travis flipped him onto his stomach, shoving his face into the revolting straw, the sharp strands pricking at his skin. He felt Travis’ heavy weight settle along his back, Bryce writhed underneath him as his hands slithered underneath his shirt, his nails crawling along his torso in a slimy manner. 

“You are so lovely McQuaid. So easy to take, so sweet to touch.” The man crooned darkly from behind him, his sultry breath hissing over the back of his ear.

He shook his head as Travis glided one of his hands over his nipple, squeezing it tenderly. Bryce mumbled nonsense, still trying hard to turn the tables and to get the other man off of him as Travis covered Bryce’s body with his own, keeping him pinned down in the hay he was sinking into slowly.

Travis hushed him gently, using one hand to twist his nipple and the other one to stroke down from his torso to his stomach gingerly. “It’s alright, I know that you think you don’t want this, but I know you’ve had the same fantasies I’ve had, and I’m about to make them real sweetie.”

Bryce bit down at his lip as the tingling sensations zapped through him from the light intimate touches the other man traced over his body. Shame flushed across his cheeks deeply as he realized that he was enjoying the touches, yet he didn’t like it. He was still struggling to get away from Travis as he ran his hands along his torso and played with him, yet the touches felt so nice and his body felt electrified by them… Disgusting.

“Pl-Please stop this Travis- I don’t want th-this.” His voice trembled as those words fell from his mouth with dead weight causing them to sink down. It didn’t matter what he said, he knew that. It was too late. 

Bryce didn’t know how this was happening, why this was happening. He couldn’t have caused this, there was no way he had given this man the wrong signals… All this time he had just thought Travis was suspicious of him, maybe too interested in why he was apart of the gang at all. But all this time… He had been crushing on Bryce? All those long stares weren’t Travis trying to get a read on Bryce, rather they had been glances that had been captivated by Bryce. He didn’t get it, but the more he thought about it, the more the odd puzzle pieces seemed to fit snugly together.

He yelped when Travis was suddenly yanking his shirt over his head, leaving him bare and cold as the material was tossed hastily to the side. Bryce tried again to talk some sense into the man, but the lust and the greed had already taken over as Travis was now restraining Bryce in place as he wrenched Bryce out of his jeans hastily.

Nothing no longer needed to be said. The creak decaying wooden boards groaned throughout the building, and heavy pants were heaving in and out of Travis’ chest as Bryce blubbered out in fear. His voice was tiny as he spoke more to himself now than to Travis, who was clearly too far gone to care.

“Please please don’t be real- I just want to go home- I want to be anywhere but here- Just- It’s a dream Bryce, it has to be. Oh gosh I hope it is. I just want to go back home to Ryan and Jon and Luke…” He cried softly as he felt the drafty air surround his entire body, the front part of it being shoved cruely into the hay pile.

Hot breaths of air were blown onto his cold skin, too loud and too close, reminding Bryce of how entirely real this situation was. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly as he heard shuffling from behind him, the sound of clothes being taken off and thrown to the side carelessly.

For a moment, Travis’ hold on Bryce loosened. And in that split second, Bryce was fighting back without a moment’s thought. Instinctively he pushed back and got onto his own two feet, swaying in place though holding himself up steadily. Travis had been caught off guard, as he had been tugging his pants off.

Bryce didn’t hesitate, he went running for the clothes that had been discarded, picking them up hastily before sprinting out of the barn without bothering to get dressed. He slammed the rickety door open with a screeching groan, and raced for his car that he had stupidly parked a little ways down the gravel road. His feet ached from the rocks that dug into them, but he wasn’t going to let something that trivial stop him now. He had a chance. He was going to save his own ass and get out of here and never look back. He was going to force Damien to quit this stupid gang with him after this, was going to scold him, maybe even hit him upside the head a little bit. Because oh god this was too scary and so dumb!

Through the adrenaline, he didn’t realize until it was too late that there had been hurried footsteps behind him, getting closer with each step he took. Bryce hadn’t realized until he was a good fifteen feet away from his car, that the man had pounced. He didn’t noticed that he had been tackled until he was already crushed into the gravel ground.

Bryce hollered out in pain as the sharp rocks dug into his naked skin harshly, specifically in an area he didn’t want to have exposed at all. He floundered from underneath the weight that was on top of him, attempting to revive his only chance to escape. It was so close…

He wailed when Travis wrapped his arm around his throat aggressively from behind him, tightening his hold around it. Bryce gasped for air desperately when his windpipe was sharply dug into, his lungs drowning with the lack of oxygen. His vision started blotching at the edges, his voice coming out in torn pleads for help. He could hear the close voice, though it sounded so distant.

“You fuckin’ piece of shit scum of the Earth, you think you’re gonna get away that easy hmm? No, I planned this out and this is going to happen. And you are going to enjoy it, and going to realize how stupid you are for not wanting this.” Travis’ voice sounded far off, full of resentment and spite, so unlike how it had sounded before.

Finally he was released, and Bryce breathed in all the oxygen that he could, the rush of air bruning his sore throat. He didn’t have much time to recover before he was hoisted over Travis’ shoulder sternly. Bryce couldn’t even think about struggling as he was still trying to regain the air in his lungs, feeling dizzy and sluggish now.

The door was shut firmly behind them as Travis entered the barn, his steps heavy as he continued to walk. Panic shot through Bryce again as he regained his senses, his awareness settling in as reality struck him across the face. That was his only chance and he had screwed it up. Bryce felt fear course through his veins as they traveled further into the barn, going through the aisle where all the worn out stalls that had once been used for horses. 

There was a the creaking sound of a door being opened, rust evident in the hinges, and suddenly Bryce was thrown to the ground, his back aching as it hit the dirtied wooden floor harshly. Bryce scrambled into a sitting position as he realized Travis had tossed him into one of the stalls. He stood broadly in the doorway now, a cruel smirk twisting across his face as he looked down at Bryce, sitting vulnerable and exposed now. Shaking like a leaf as a million thoughts swam around in his mind, drowning by the storm of emotions.

“You want to act like a goddamn animal Bryce? Is that it?” Travis scolded, the power must be getting to his head, the grin spreading more as he looked down with wild eyes. Bryce noted alarmingly that the excitement was evident in the jeans he had never finished taking off. 

Bryce backed into the wall as Travis leered in closer, his nose nearly touching Bryce’s, “When an animal does something bad, what usually happens sweetheart?” Bryce felt a shiver go down his spine as Travis lifted his chin up with his fingers, so that they held eye contact with one another.

Bryce didn’t say anything, too scared that Travis would snap at him if he was wrong. Despair weighed his mind down, he just wanted to be back home. He shouldn’t have come, especially alone. Especially without telling anyone. He hadn’t expected to be ambushed, at the very least he thought he would have had a fair chance to attack Travis back if anything happened. And he certainly had not been expecting for anything like this to happen. Bryce’s thoughts were too all over the place to properly fit together, jumping from one thing onto the next. 

He watched as Travis backed away, standing up and looking around before his eyes were trained on something behind him, outside the stall. Travis didn’t get far enough away for Bryce to think about escaping before he was back, shutting the door behind him with a creepily slow screech, before his eyes were trained on Bryce again, something behind his back.

“Lie down on your back.” Travis commanded with a glare, the smile wiped away from his face, though it was still glinting evilly in his eyes. 

Bryce wanted to refuse, but given the dire circumstance and the fact that he was not going to easily be given the chance to escape, he cooperated anxiously. 

He was startled when Travis’s heavy footsteps were suddenly right by him, and he flinched when the man yanked one of his arms, clearly in sight now as he took his other arm and started to wrap something rough and coarse around his wrists.

“When an animal misbehaves,” Travis grunted, tying what Bryce discovered was tough rope painfully tight around his wrists, “It gets punished. And baby, you fuckin’ misbehaved. I told you that I am going to have my way with you, and I will.”

Bryce squeezed eyes shut as labored breaths choked out of his lungs. He felt his arms being wrenched over his head and opened his eyes to see Travis working above his head, tying the rope to a post behind him.

Travis was back in his face again, roughly grabbing Bryce’s jaw and forcing him into an aggressive kiss, practically swallowing Bryce’s tongue as he forced his own into Bryce’s mouth. Travis yanked his head back with a dark look, no longer pretending to be sweet. His eyes were cold and his mouth twisted into a heartless frown.

“Stay put angel.” He said in a sing song voice, though his face was still held tightly in a grimace. The odd combination shook Bryce, and he watched as Travis left the stall. 

He tugged at the rope that burned into the soft skin of his wrists, knowing immediately that in his position that it would be incredibly difficult to get the rope off. Bryce looked around the stall warily, finding only old straw and a few puddles of algae filled splotches of water on the stall ground. He couldn’t find anything of interest, the only other thing he saw was the food trough and water trough, though both were too far up for him to properly see what was inside, though he had a feeling he didn’t want to know either way. 

He didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how he was going to get out of this. There was still part of him thinking this was just some vivid nightmare. Though he knew deep down this was real. Bryce felt guilt wrenching in his stomach as he thought about Luke, Ryan, and Jonathan. He couldn’t believe this was going to happen. He refused to believe it.

His boyfriends wouldn’t even know the difference. He always had to go out at night for gang related activity, so him staying out later than intended wouldn’t cause any suspicion. Maybe they would ask Damien where he was. He wondered what he would do when he came back- Bryce whimpered softly at the thought of never seeing them again. No no, Travis wasn’t going to kill him, that would be too obvious… Right?

Travis came back into the stall, and Bryce paled at the sight that stood before him. In Travis’ hands was a leather collar and a muzzle designed specifically for humans. Why did he even have those?? Travis’ words from earlier echoed in his mind.  _ No, I planned this out and this is going to happen.  _

Bryce attempted to back away, and he yelped when his hair was ruthlessly snatched in Travis’ grasp, forcing him to look up. His eyes widened as he saw the muzzle being brought towards his face, and he tried to shake his head though the hand in his hair only tightened all the more painfully, forcing him to stay still. 

“That way I won’t have to hear you beg or cry… You don’t deserve that right anymore.” Travis growled in his ear as he began to put the muzzle on, the cold leather surprising Bryce as he adjusted it accordingly. 

Within a few minutes, it was on securely. Bryce felt tears pricking at his eyes as he tried to open his mouth to speak only to find his jaw was clamped tightly. Travis yanked his head back, his hand still tightly holding onto the locks of Bryce’s hair. Bryce began to tremble as he felt a more chilly material on his skin, being wrapped around his neck. He repeated a mantra in his head, the same words over and over again.  _ This is not happening. Wake up. _

He felt extremely vulnerable lying on his back like this, arms held over his head and anything he could have said muted by the muzzle. Bryce did feel like an animal with the collar around his neck, realizing with what little movement he made that the thing jingled, causing a pit of disgust to form in his gut. He was completely exposed to Travis, who was now standing up and looking down at Bryce as if to admire his work. He felt as if he was on display for the man, and he felt nauseous at the thought.

Bryce tried to blink the tears away and tried to keep a steady pace of breathing, but he didn’t have enough time to recompose himself before Travis was hurriedly taking off the rest of his articles of clothing off, until he was standing completely nude before Bryce. Bryce couldn’t help but notice how big he was, and knew he wouldn’t have minded so much aside from the fact he knew that Travis was going to try and hurt him. It wasn’t long until he was crawling over Bryce, clearly enjoying the power he had over him.

Bryce squirmed when Travis placed his hands on his knees, drawing them up and spreading them apart so that Bryce was absolutely demoralized. Like some animal. With no control over anything going on, not even being able to beg or plead anymore. Caught in his like some wild game, prey to the human.

There was no warning, no preparation, absolutely nothing before Travis was suddenly forcing himself into Bryce, tearing into his anus with a painful shove. Bryce cried out, his voice muffled and uncared for as Travis wrenched himself deeper into Bryce’s body. His body was shooting burning sensations through his spine, and he wailed out to nobody in agony. 

The tears were running freely now, and Bryce felt disgusting as he felt snot dribble down his face. He felt sick to his stomach as Travis looked down at his face and his smile only began to get more sinister. Bryce squeezed his eyes shut as Travis finally got the entirety of his length within him, he felt too full, as if his bottom was going to break at the seams. He was too tight around him given that he wasn’t prepared in anyway, and Travis seemed to only get more excited over that fact.

Bryce flinched as Travis brought his hand near his face, carding his fingers through Bryce’s hair gently as he pushed further in just to see if he could. “Good boy Brycey.” Travis murmured, his eyes fluttering shut at whatever ecstasy he was feeling.

Tears were still streaming down his face, and he knew what was going to come next. Bryce let out a painful gasp as Travis quickly pulled himself out of Bryce, feeling relieved for a moment before he was screaming out harshly as Travis abruptly drove himself back in completely. Bryce shook and sobbed as Travis repeated the process a few times, before he found something that Bryce didn’t want to think about. It hurt so much, and he felt a sick twist of pleasure build up in his groin as Travis hit that sweet spot. He knew that Travis had known the moment he found it, because suddenly all that energy was focused on slamming himself into it. 

Travis was gripping at Bryce’s thighs harshly, his nails digging deeply into the flesh there as he brutally defiled Bryce. Bryce didn’t care anymore that he was sobbing and wailing, everything just felt like too much, and he felt humiliated and shameful of himself. Despite knowing logically he had done nothing to bring this upon himself.

He just wanted this to end. But the entire thing felt like an eternity. With Travis heaving hotly above him, sweating and face twisted and red. It made Bryce feel bitter that he was becoming hard from the act of Travis thrusting into him just right. Raping him in such a way that it felt good, that thought alone made Bryce sob all the more, the gut wrenching feeling of despair settling deeply into him. 

It was too long, the assault was repetitive and filled Bryce with a sense of something he had never felt before, self-disgust, perhaps even hate to himself. He didn’t understand why, he hadn’t done anything wrong to be deserving of this. All the same though, he felt like it was his fault, that he was disgusting and vile and corrupted. His body didn’t feel like something that was worth anybody’s time anymore. He didn’t want to think of what his lovers would think of him when they found out what had been done to him. Didn’t want them to ever know that he had been treated in such a sick way, as if he were just vermin on the streets. He didn’t want them to know, the humiliation too great in itself.

Bryce felt a choked sob force its way up his throat as Travis’ fingers weaved into his hair, gripping roughly as he shook over Bryce, his breaths hitched and his entire face beet red. With one last violent shove, Bryce could feel hot liquid he didn’t want to think about bursting into his body. Travis finally stopped moving, slumping onto Bryce as he heaved heavily over him, his hands still resting in his hair as his face was pressed into Bryce’s chest. It felt so wrong to have such a different body laid over his own, someone who was not one of his lovers. He wondered absentmindedly if this would be considered cheating, though it was obvious that he was trying to think of anything aside from what had just happened.

Though he was still crying, Bryce didn’t feel like he was here anymore. Something had shifted inside of him so that he felt this odd floating sensation. As if his mind couldn’t deal with what had just happened to him and was trying to get away from everything. As if it had been on overload with the pain, the emotions, and the trauma in general, and had just overheated with everything it had to process. Bryce laid still as Travis slowly began to regain his senses, sluggishly sitting up to look down at Bryce.

Bryce noticed with clouded thoughts that Travis was saying something as he began to untie Bryce. He was sat up and when looking down at his wrists he noted that they were beginning to bruise deeply, and that the rope had even burned into his flesh. He hadn’t even realized he was pulling on it so harshly, and he still didn’t feel the pain on them.

Travis began to stand Bryce up, his muzzle and collar still on as Travis guided Bryce over to the troughs in the stall. He obediently kneeled in front of one of them, his vision dazed over. When his face was harshly shoved into the icy water he finally snapped back to reality, writhing in Travis’ grip as he was held down in the water.

Finally Bryce got his face out of the water, complete shock coursing through him as everything dawned on him at once. He crumpled against the water trough, bringing his arms around his body as he trembled and sobbed. 

“It’s alright Bryce, shhh.” He could feel Travis’ warm hands stroking his back, and he felt disgusting for wanting to lean into his touch. He wanted to puke at the thoughts that rampaged his mind. 

Bryce didn’t fight back as Travis hauled him up, though he did snap his eyes open with shock when his entire body was dumped into the water. He immediately felt the cold bite into his bones, and tried to stand up so he could get out, but Travis held him in place.

So he waited as he trembled as Travis finally began to undo his collar and his muzzle. He felt so free once they were off, but at this point he had no words to say. He shivered violently in the trough of water, and his eyes widened upon seeing how disgusting the water was, and he felt mortified upon seeing a light cloud of pink liquid float in the water. He hoped he didn’t get any diseases or anything, this wasn’t sanitary at all and he was sure by the feeling in his anus that it was shredded open. 

“That wasn’t too bad now was it?” Travis spoke lightly, his voice so gentle that it revolted Bryce. His teeth chattered and he finally leaned into Travis’ warm hand that had cupped his cheek. “We’ll get you home now Brycey, would you like that?”

Bryce felt so despicable that this was one of the last things he wanted. He kind of wanted to die, though preferably just wanted to disappear. Not exist at all. That sounded so nice, just to be gone. But he nodded as he felt his entire body begin to freeze up.

He was lifted from the water trough, and he nearly let himself curl up against Travis’ warm body before he got some sense into his head and refused to do such a thing. He let himself lie limply in his arms as Travis carried him out to the barn. Everything was hazy as he allowed himself to be dressed by his assaulter… his rapist… The thoughts warped themselves cruelly in his mind, and Bryce squeezed his eyes shut to ward them off. 

He was left alone for a few minutes. Bryce thought about running off before realizing that his bottom was in searing pain without him even moving. He just sat on the floor of the barn, grateful to be fully dressed as he waited for Travis to come back. His thoughts, and his body, were numb, and he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do, supposed to think. He had always known that rape was something that happened, though never considered what the aftermath could be. How did you deal with something so horrific? How did you keep living life as if everything was okay. Bryce realized with shock that he might not even escape this.

Travis came back into the room completely dressed and with something suspicious in his hand, though Bryce decided not to think about it as he shakily got onto his own feet. He tensed up as Travis threw an arm around Bryce’s shoulders, drawing him too close to him as he began to lead Bryce outside the barn and to his car. Bryce panicked as he realized that Travis had confiscated Luke’s gun from him, but he knew better now not to say anything of it. Instead he shuffled along with Travis and hung his head down shamefully.

“I’ll drive you home baby. I can get somebody else to pick up my truck later on.” Travis spoke huskily, sticking his hand out as he waited for Bryce to fetch his keys out of his pocket. He did without thinking, knowing that he wasn’t going to be able to drive correctly after this anyway. Then again maybe that was a blessing in disguise.

Travis unlocked Bryce’s car and opened the passenger seat for him, and Bryce slowly slid in, wincing as pain shot through him again. The door was shut firmly beside him, and Bryce slumped in his seat as Travis got into the driver’s seat, immediately covering Bryce’s hand with his own. As if he owned him. 

The car ride was painfully long, the silence tense and building up between them before Travis finally spoke, “Sweetie, don’t be mad at me. Next time I will make sure you have a little fun too. I just get a little greedy sometimes, but I‘ll share the pleasure I promise.”

Bryce paled as he processed what had been said, his breath hitching in his throat as his entire body froze up. “N-No I don’t want there to be a next time.” He whispered raspily, the first thing he said since his muzzle had been unstrapped.

This seemed to rile Travis up, because suddenly he was pulling on the side of the road, and his hand was roughly gripping onto Bryce’s chin, forcing Bryce to look at him. “Well there’s gonna be a next time. That was the most good I’ve felt in years, and you will understand that sooner or later. Bryce I don’t think you get it still, you are mine. I marked you and I made you mine tonight, and you will be forever, got it? There’s no escaping this so you might as well shape up and learn to like it. Understood?”

Bryce felt bitter tears pooling in his eyes again as fear shook him, but he nodded quickly as horror seeped into his mind. He whispered quietly, “Understood..”

“I want you to tell me that you belong to me Bryce.” Travis said in a commanding tone, looking down on Bryce who was caving in on himself in his seat.

He hesitated, thinking of Jonathan, Luke, and Ryan. He didn’t want to say it, didn’t want to actively take part in this when he had so many lovers at home who genuinely cared for him.

“ _ Bryce _ .” Travis warned darkly, his eyes intense as he looked down at Bryce.

In the tiniest voice, Bryce trembled as he said, “I-I belong to you…” How horrific. He felt so unfaithful and terrible as those words were forced out of his lips.

Travis captured those same cheating lips with his own, and Bryce whimpered as Travis moaned into his mouth deeply. He was relieved that it didn’t last long, and he hung his head in shame as Travis began to drive again, the rest of the car ride void of any talk.

They were finally in front of Bryce’s house, and Bryce didn’t want to begin wondering how Travis knew exactly where to go. He parked a little ways down the street, and Bryce noticed with slight panic that Ryan’s car was already in the driveway. 

Travis placed his hand on top of Bryce’s again, “I know about your living situation, and I can share you for now. But I don’t know how long that’s going to last.” Travis growled the last bit quietly. Bryce tensed at the implications. He had been hoping that Travis didn’t know about his boyfriends…

“But as long as you cooperate with me, everyone will be unharmed. If you refuse though, I cannot guarantee your brother’s safety. Nor your  _ lovers _ .” Travis spat out firmly. 

Bryce felt nauseous again, but he nodded. He understood. He just felt dizzy thinking about what he meant, felt terrified to know that this was going to have to happen again if he wanted to keep those he loved safe. But it was worth it. 

Travis slid out of the car after giving Bryce one more dirty kiss, before he was left alone in the passenger’s seat. Bryce sat there for awhile, finally feeling a little safer despite knowing that he wasn’t safe in any way at all. He felt numb, but he finally switched over to the driver’s seat and pulled his car into his driveway, pulling himself together as he left the car and headed for the house.


	2. Round Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bryce has to face his lovers with the aftermath of what had just happened... And has to deal with the crushing reality of the same thing happening to him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lateish upload. Was a little loopy yesterday. Still am. xD  
> I am not even finished with the third part yet so actually may post that in two weeks rather than in one. We will see!  
> Hope you enjoy this chapter. I am very sorry again.

Bryce holds his breath, pressing his ear against the wooden door in order to listen carefully for anything too loud. He was beginning to tremble in place, fear gutting him as he realized that he may have to face his lovers. He just wanted to curl up in a ball and never think again. He didn’t want to have to deal with anyone.

He slowly opened the front door with a tiny squeak, and avoided looking around the living room in order to focus his attention on closing the door. He finally braced himself and turned around, a relieved sigh slipping past his lips as he saw that the coast was clear. Bryce sagged against the front door, finally feeling content enough to allow himself to breathe normally, sucking in ragged breaths of air as he tried to think logically about what to do next. 

Maybe it was a good thing that he hadn’t been given a chance to thoroughly process that string of thoughts, because where the hell do you begin to think logically in a situation such as this. Within moments, Jonathan was casually strolling into the room, scrolling through the phone in his hands when he glanced up to see Bryce standing against the door. Bryce paled, standing upright and pressing himself against the wood as fear and paranoia zapped through him. 

“Hey Bryce, how was work honey?” Jonathan asked absentmindedly, though Bryce could feel his eyes intensify on him as he noticed the visible signs of distress Bryce was radiating. “You okay Bryce?”

He forgot how he was supposed to respond. A part of him wanted to sob and cling onto Jonathan, using him as an anchor for support. Another part of him was revolted at the very thought of any kind of physical contact, feeling an ill wave of nausea hit his gut at the thought. And so he stood frozen, eyes wide as he looked right through Jon with no response to the question he had asked.

Jonathan got closer, startling Bryce so much that he hit the back of his head against the door behind him. “Bryce!! Shit! Are you alright??” Jon cried out, freezing in place as his eyes widened from the sharp sound that had been caused by the involuntary action. Bryce could tell that he was hesitating, not sure whether to move forward in fear of Bryce hurting himself again.

Bryce nodded, tears stinging in his eyes as he bit down harshly at his lower lip. He was being so stupid. He was acting too on edge- He didn’t want them to find out. They’d hate him… And Travis would hurt them. Bryce finally found the energy to force a smile on his face, gritting his teeth as he spoke, “Yeah I’m fine, sorry. Long day. It was exhausting, people were being so rude to me all day. They were all so snappy. I was going to go and take a shower and maybe just watch YouTube or something.”

It was apparent that Jon still had his concerns and suspicions, but he nodded slowly with a grimace. “You should try sleeping soon after though, okay hun?”

Jonathan was certainly not the smartest man in the world, but he was incredibly sharp when it mattered. He always noticed the small off things about people, and Bryce must have be sending screaming sirens into his brain now. But he tried to smile, and nodded with a hum of agreement. “I’ll do that, don’t worry.”

Bryce waited until Jon gave him another look, and walked back down the hallway, probably to join Ryan and Luke on their bed. Bryce wasted no time to walk briskly down the hall, entering the bathroom and quickly taking his clothes off despite the searing pain that shot through him. He turned on the water until it was burning hot, the entire room thick with steam. He stepped into the shower and was surprised by the lack of feeling he held when the scalding hot water soaked into his skin until it was an obviously irritatingly bright red color. 

He didn’t care, facing the shower head on with his eyes close as he let the stream of water rain down harshly across his cheeks and his nose. Letting the numbness take over his physical feelings as his thoughts were anything but that. 

The thoughts washed over him like a storm, pounding more bitterly than even the burning shower that drove into his body. He couldn’t bear to carry his weight up anymore, letting his body sink to the floor as he curled his knees up to his chest as suddenly his body was wracked his choked back sobs. He began to feel breathless, trying desperately to suck air into his lungs as a full on frenzy of anxieties were over poured into his brain, spilling over at the edges. He tried to force himself to breathe regularly, but that only made things worse, and suddenly he couldn’t even wheeze in an ounce of oxygen. Bryce tumbled out of his fetal position, clawing freely at his face and his throat as panic overwhelmed him.  _ He couldn’t breathe. Oh god, he couldn’t breathe. He was going to die, he was going to suffocate on these horrid thoughts that overtook his sanity. _

Nothing was working at all. His vision was darkening and suddenly he couldn’t think at all. Bryce’s thoughts halted entirely as he realized this. He couldn’t think, the jumbled thoughts that had been on overdrive had now froze in place. His vision was black around the edges, his breathing completely halted as he sat on the floor of the tub, swaying in place as the hot water continued to drown on him.

Maybe it would be okay to do this. He didn’t want this anymore. He didn’t want anything anymore. The thoughts were fading away and if that meant he would have to as well, then so be it. 

Just as he was letting go, he heard the door to the bathroom slam. He heard an anxious voice calling out something. He was so shocked by the abruptness, all that he had forgotten was snapped back into place, and his lungs were suddenly working again. He sharply inhaled, being thrown into a violent coughing fit as he adjusted to the fact that he was breathing again. That he was here again.

“Bryce!?? Bryce, baby, are you alright in there???” Luke’s voice wasn’t distant anymore, but rather it sounded very close and very frightened. Bryce tried to respond but ended up coughing roughly instead, hacking in air at any chance he got.

“I-I’m okay.” He said weakly, needing to repeat it as Luke was slamming on the door again, his voice louder this time. He was able to grab Luke’s attention finally, and he leaned against the wall of the tub.

Luke didn’t seem to believe him, “You sure you okay in there baby?” His voice overly concerned, nearly motherly.

“Yeah-Yeah sorry. I just- Dazed off there for a second.” He called back, feeling dizzy as he pressed his head against the cold tiles of the bath.

Luke seemed satisfied with that answer, and Bryce didn’t really want to be in there anymore anyways. He scrambled up to his feet, nearly slipping in the process before catching himself, and he turned off the water to the shower, forcing himself to get dressed into his clothes from earlier.

When Bryce finally slipped out of the bathroom with waves of steam rolling out behind him, he saw that Luke had left. He peered down the hall and saw the bedroom light streaming through the slightly cracked open door. Bryce shuffled down the hall quietly, listening to their hushed voices as they all spoke amongst each other.

“I’m worried…”

“Maybe he’s just overworking himself.”

“Something doesn’t feel right.”

Bryce’s breath hitched in his throat, though he forced himself to calm down before another panic attack floundered him. He went past the bedroom and looked at the couch in the living room. It seemed so much more safe tonight. He didn’t want to tangle his legs up with his lovers tonight. His gut was still heavily set with guilt and self disgust, and he really didn’t think he could handle any of the attention or affection they normally showed him.

So he curled up on the couch, pulling a blanket that had been left out up to his chin as he stuffed his face into one of the cheap couch pillows they had bought.

His thoughts were wearing him down, but he was more exhausted than he had even imagined, his body quite easily getting drowsy and heavy. He could feel all the pain still though it seemed to be won over by the exhaustion. 

Bryce’s eyelids dragged down over his eyes like lead, and his body felt as if it were floating away now. He let himself go, not bothering to allow himself to dwell on any of the horrifying thoughts that were racing in his mind. 

 

\---

 

Bryce was given a day of solitude. His boyfriends were all at work by the time he woke up, though he had several more blankets draped onto him and a cute purple sticky note posted on the coffee table with some adorable handwriting on it. His phone’s LED light was flicked on, indicating that he had some notifications on there as well.

Everything in his fuzzy mind seemed normal. Everything seemed pretty alright, and nothing seemed out of place. He had an icky feeling in his gut though, and suddenly it all washed over him at once. All the horrific images, all of the dirty words and the sounds and the terrible painstaking feelings were shattering upon his mind like glass shards digging deeply into those peaceful feelings of a norm. Bryce startled upright, already on the verge of tears. He winced at the sudden movement, feeling a swelling pain in between his legs ache sharply. Bryce already felt the bitter hot tears pouring down his cheeks as he realized it wasn’t some horrible nightmare. He could feel it, he could see it, he could smell it. He still felt vile, he still wanted to claw his nails deep into his own flesh and just start ripping it apart. 

Instead Bryce grabbed at his own hair, which also hurt from yesterday, and he clung onto it tightly and tried to breathe through the sudden panic that was coursing through him. It was too early for this. It was too much for him right now. He didn’t want to be stuck here. All alone. With these atrocious thoughts overwhelming his senses.

Bryce shook through the sobs that were wrenched out of him and he tried to distract himself, fumbling with the note that had been left on the table. It only caused him to weep all the more, the feeling of guilt and sorrow washing over him at the words that were so carefully written by his lovers.

 

_ Bryce, we know you had a hard day last night. So just take it easy. We will be doing the shopping today, and after we get home from work we can all cuddle up and just watch a movie together. Take it easy today, and try to stay home and rest. We love you so much!  _

_ -Ryan, Jonny, and Luke <3 _

Bryce clung onto the purple piece of paper tightly, dripping tears onto it as he hunched over with the sobs wracking throughout his body harshly. 

He tried to calm himself down. He didn’t want to have another panic attack so tried to work himself through this meltdown before it got to be too much for him to handle. Bryce threw the blankets off of himself and swung his legs over the couch until he was sitting upright. He clasped his hands together after settling the crumpled up sticky note onto the table. Hanging his head, he let the tears flow as he inhaled deeply, holding the breath for a few seconds before letting it out slowly. He repeated this over and over again, and finally felt his mind’s race calm down along with his breathing. The tears were still flowing, but Bryce wiped them away as much as he could before he gently grabbed his phone and unlocked the screen with shaking hands.

Bryce smiled a tiny bit as he read the texts his boyfriends had sent him. Luke had send him a silly video full of memes that made him chuckle lightly. Jonathan had sent him a cute and quick message, full of his usual funny typos, and some pictures of Bryce’s cats. And Ryan had sent a meaningful message telling him to hang in there and giving him inspirational quotes, before he had sent some cute selfies they had taken on a date they had all gone on months prior.

Bryce sighed, feeling a little more content despite everything. His lovers knew how to make him feel better, all in their own little special ways. Bryce curled up on himself at the corner of the couch, lovingly gazing at the screen of his phone when suddenly a new text came in, surprising him greatly. 

It was from an unknown number, and Bryce could feel his heart race at the anticipation of who it might be. He held his breath, not wanting to think anything bad before it happened. Maybe one of his friends had just gotten a new number. Right?

He swiped the message from the unknown number open hesitantly, and immediately felt like puking his guts out at what awaited him. He gasped painfully as shame and fear flooded him. He stared at the images in horror. There were even some video clips! He didn’t want to watch it, didn’t want to look at this. It couldn’t be real- There was no way that…

Pictures from last night. Videos from last night. All horrific looking, all disgusting and making him want to drown himself in his own humiliation. There were five pictures. Of him. Tied up, and looking as if he were enjoying it in some twisted way. Then there was the last shot, his legs so clearly spread and his face contorted in agony and full of tears. He was- He was bleeding. He was so skinny and so vulnerable. Travis was in this shot, standing off to the side and looking down at Bryce proudly. So gruesome and terrifying. 

The videos, he couldn’t help but to torture himself all the more as hatred coursed through his veins. Hatred for Travis. For himself most of all. They were nasty, vulgar, they made Bryce sick to his stomach. The sounds, the screams, the moans. He couldn’t watch them all. He couldn’t get through even two of the short clips before he was hurriedly deleting them all through his blurred vision. He tried to block the number, though he wasn’t able to before he got an ominous text.

_ Until next time baby ;) _

 

He felt like throwing his phone across the room before he was finally able to block the number. Fear and revulsion filling his heart and mind entirely.

And no matter how many times he read his lovers’ texts and notes… He couldn’t shake it this time around.

 

\---

 

He hadn’t done much that day, mostly sulking and dealing with crippling fear and anxiety by himself. Bryce was in the armchair with the television on in front of him when Luke, Ryan, and Jon all walked into the house. He hadn’t been really watching the show, had been completely numb and lost in his own thoughts when they had entered.

His eyes must be bloodshot and puffy. He knew that he didn’t look good but he only hoped his lovers would understand that he just had a rough day… He hoped that they wouldn’t think anything more of it and get suspicious.

Jon was holding a box of pizza, and he smiled at Bryce as he sauntered over to the couch and placed the box before him on the coffee table. Quickly leaning over to peck Bryce on the crown of his head sweetly. Bryce tensed up though it wasn’t very obvious underneath the layers of blankets he had wrapped himself up in. He gave his lover a half hearted smile from under the covers as Ryan and Luke entered the room, plopping themselves onto the couch next to Jon. They were all chattering away about something Bryce couldn’t quite keep up with, and he flinched back suddenly when a plate with two slices of pizza was shoved into his face.

“Eat up buttercup,” Ryan said in a gentle singsong voice. His worried eyes intent on him because of Bryce’s unusual reaction. 

Bryce felt his stomach roll nauseously at the smell of the food, though it would have normally been a delicious thought, he was now feeling sick to his stomach as he thought about how he would have to force that down his throat and as he knew that the feeling of the food would feel too heavy in his stomach.

But he accepted it, knowing that if he didn’t his boyfriends’ suspicions would only grow at an alarming rate. They all settled on the couch, and Bryce decided that the best way to make them think he was okay was to sit next to one of them. There was an empty spot in between Jonathan and Ryan, so Bryce uncurled himself from his warm blankets and slid into the spot with his plate of pizza on his lap. This seemed to make them all much more comfortable and the tension in the room eased up greatly. 

The movie was on but nobody was paying it any mind. Bryce tried to ease himself into the couch as he listened to them all speak around him. He tried not to tense up every time Ryan would put his hand on his knee, or when Jonathan would wave a hand excitedly in his face as he gestured wildly while speaking. He tried not to let Luke’s skeptical look get to him. 

Bryce was lucky enough to have Luke as his boyfriend, because that meant that nothing went past him. Luke worked as a detective, and often would sense that something was up before everyone else. So when Luke darted those suspicious glances at Bryce, he could only try his best to act naturally before him.

Jonathan was snapping in his face, and Bryce broke out of his thoughts, “Earth ta’ Bryce. You still there baby?” Bryce couldn’t help the grimace that crossed over his face at the petname. But he quickly recomposed himself and nodded quickly.

“Sorry. Just thinking… Sorry about yesterday. I just- I had a rough day.” He said softly, his voice cracking slightly as he thought about how  _ rough _ it had really been. He shut his eyes tightly at the disgusting thought.

Jonathan frowned, his eyes pooled with concern, “Do you wanna talk about it?”

Ryan was at his other side, and Bryce jumped away violently when his hand went to soothingly rub at Bryce’s arm. Everyone was quiet for a moment as they took in what had happened. Bryce had never done that before. He had always been really good about physical affection and touch. Sometimes Ryan was a little jumpy, but Bryce never had been.

“What happened Bryce?” Luke asked sternly, his voice was still full of affection but it was also very commanding right now, making Bryce more nervous. He felt anxiety fill him up quickly.

“It’s nothing. I’m fine.” He blatantly lied despite the evidence that said otherwise. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t lie to them. It was so difficult. “I just want to go to bed please.” He said meekly, looking away from all of their eyes.

Luke wasn’t taking his attempts to get out of the conversation however, “Bullshit. We know what’s fine and what’s not and something is up. What’s goin’ on Bryce? Why ain’t you telling us nothing? You can trust us, right?” 

Bryce shook his head, and for what seemed like the hundredth time in the last couple of days, his eyes were watering again. Jonathan sat up alert, concern exemplifying, and Ryan leaned in closer with such great worry that Bryce was reminded of a mother. Luke’s face fell, the tough facade broken as he witnessed Bryce begin to cry. 

“Bryce- I didn’t mean to-” Luke started off in a husky whisper. 

Bryce began to stand up, feeling whatever cracked wall he had left crumbling. He froze when he felt a hand wrap itself around his wrist, and was grateful when Ryan snapped, “Jon let go. He needs some time alone.”

Bryce rushed away from the scene quickly, heading to their bedroom and locking the door behind him as his thoughts swam through his mind. He didn’t know if Luke was genuinely concerned or if he was making accusations at him. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do, how he was going to fix this. How he was going to handle any of this. It was all too much for him to handle and he felt afraid. Bryce paced in the room anxiously, wringing his hands together. He thought briefly about playing his guitar but it didn’t feel right. Nothing felt right anymore.

Terror filled Bryce as he wondered how they would all react if they found out. They would undoubtedly be disgusted with him, would they think he was cheating? Would they be mad? He didn’t know what he could handle with them anymore, if he would ever be able to do anything with them physically after such a traumatizing event. Bryce didn’t want them to look down at him. He didn’t want them to be worried or even pretend that they cared… 

Would they break up with him? He loved them all so dearly that the very idea squeezed his heart. He had always known they were all perfect for him, but hundreds of insecurities have always held him back and now that was amplified so much more. 

He couldn’t let them find out what had happened. Bryce didn’t want to lose them.

 

\---

 

Bryce didn’t argue that day in the car. He hardly said a word as Damien drove recklessly toward their destination - the pier. The last few days had been increasingly difficult for him, but somehow he had managed to pull off a forced facade and had lessened the worry and anxiety his lovers held for him with each smile he plastered onto his face. He choked out laughs as he stuffed down sobs. But he was still terrified of what today would bring, and he tried so hard to wring away any ounce of anxiety away from his actions.

He had reached a breaking point this morning, as he was alone and getting ready for the mission their gang was going to be performing in today. Terrible thoughts and imagery muffled his mind and tore apart his sanity. Bryce had let himself break down before quickly composing himself. He couldn’t keep doing this, he had to stay strong. For Damien. For his boyfriends.

Now he sat in the car beside his brother, anxiety was clawing up his mind, ripping it into shreds brutally. It was important for him to keep his demeanor steady as everything within him whirled like a wild hurricane. He couldn’t let it get out of the weak cage he had trapped it in. 

“Are you alright Bryce?” Damien asked, glancing over at Bryce worriedly. Bryce tensed up as his brother continued, “You haven’t even attempted to convince me to quit the gang yet. It’s pretty weird.”

Bryce relaxed slightly, though he was still very much on edge as he wrung his fingers together tightly, “There’s no point anymore,” He said in a hushed voice, “You’re not gonna listen to me. So why try?” 

It was the partial truth. He had given up hope at this point to get Damien out of the gang, he had given up long ago though had never admitted defeat until this moment. He had remained stubborn, but there was nothing left for him to fight for now. It wasn’t like it mattered now anyways, he was going to end up more trapped in the gang than Damien was at this point. 

Damien didn’t say anything back, and upon a quick glance at his younger sibling, Bryce found that he was frowning with his eyes trained ahead on the road before him. As if he were contemplating something silently.

The rest of the car ride was full of loud music and an uneasy tension between Bryce and Damien, although maybe only Bryce felt it. After all, he was horrified about what lay before him when he saw Travis once more. 

It was too soon when the engine of the car wheezed out it’s last puff of breath and Damien was already opening the door. Bryce copied him numbly, nearly tumbling out of the car before he quickly caught his own balance. His legs felt like jello as his eyes caught sight of the ocean stretched out across the horizon just a few yards ahead of him. The scent in the air was brisk and salty, the sound of waves breaking out across the sand, slamming against the rocks. It was very soothing. The steady rhythm pulled Bryce into the moment, briefly enlightening the dark thoughts that shadowed his mind. 

Bryce broke out of his trance as Damien cut through his line of vision, heading towards an isolated group of warehouses that sat at the very edge of the city they were in. There was a tattered pier that sat across the ocean, not looking quite as wide or long as it was from Bryce’s current point of view.

He followed his brother silently, and they turned right and headed towards one of the warehouses silently. Bryce felt his stomach twist into a knot as he was faced with some of the other gang members from their group. Most of them cursing at each other or shoving one another roughly. Bryce looked around and saw Travis in the corner, hidden in the shadows with bright eyes and a smirk, his eyes already focused intently at Bryce. When their eyes met, Bryce shuddered as Travis visibly licked at his upper lip. His gaze predatory and possessive. Bryce kept his head down after that.

He could feel the terror shaking the limbs in his body uncontrollably, though he tried hard to breathe evenly in order to steady himself. 

Soon enough Travis was speaking, talking about how they were going to play this through. It all seemed to be going the way he had originally presented the situation. They would set up people in different areas in case something went wrong. Some people would be at the pier, others on the beach, and the lesser known members (like Bryce) would be awaiting in the warehouse. Just in case. They would bring the money, and the other gang would bring the drugs. They would both have one person assigned to trading with the other. 

Usually when things did go sour, those assigned to do the trade were the first to die, as they were in such a vulnerable position, and everyone’s attentions were drawn toward them. Bryce had seen it done only once before. It had been sudden, there was an argument and a lash out and a brief bloodbath had been shed upon both groups before they had finally all calmed down and made a truce. There had been three people killed, and many more injured.

“Bryce.” Bryce snapped his head up immediately when he heard Travis’ voice beckon for him to come up to where he was. He felt fear stammer in his bones, anxiety crunching the muscles in his body as he trudged up to the front of the gang. He didn’t know what to expect, he wasn’t supposed to be called up. He prayed to god that Travis wasn’t going to humiliate him in front of everyone. In front of his brother…

Bryce reached to the front, where Travis was standing, though he hesitated to move those last few feet toward his boss. Which is why when Travis firmly grasped onto his shoulders he had to stifle a yelp, and he kept his head down as he was repositioned beside Travis. He squeezed his eyes shut as the man put an arm around his shoulders, squeezing one affectionately.

“Bryce here will be the man to make the trade today. He so kindly volunteered the other day.” Travis spoke confidently. 

Horror struck Bryce’s features. He was glad that nobody could see his expressions as his head was still hanging and facing the ground. Shock and pure terror were wrenched into his gut as he tried to regain his bearings cautiously. This couldn’t be possible. What nonsense came out of Travis’ mouth was in no way the truth. 

Bryce startled when Travis shoved a few duffle bags into his arms, urging him to walk outside the warehouse as he yelled at the other gang members to get into position. Bryce caught Damien’s eye for a split second, and he paled at the dirty look his brother dished out before turning on his heel and outside the building.

He was trembling as he was left alone with Travis. Bryce tensed up as he felt the man’s hand firmly grip his shoulder from behind. He glued his eyes shut in fear when he felt hot breath and splatters of spit spray out onto his ear, the chilly voice speaking, “I know you will do a good job Brycey. After all, you don’t want to worry your loved ones now do you?”

Bryce snapped his head back to look at Travis, and a tiny whine escaped his lips before he could stop it. Travis’ stare was intense as he looked down upon him, a greedy and lustful look waning over his features as he looked down at Bryce like he wasn’t even human. He stuffed down any tears that threatened to spill over as nasty thoughts of himself poured into his mind ruefully. 

_ It’s because you aren’t human Bryce. You’re just a filthy animal. A cheater. A liar. Used. Utterly disgusting. Nobody can stand you. _

He heaved for air as the thoughts clouded his mind, but in no time, someone had come back to retrieve both him and Travis, letting them both know that everything had been properly situated. Bryce drew in on himself as Travis shoved him forward, the heavy bags bundled up full of money were beginning to cause his arms to ache now.

The sun was beginning to lower underneath the horizon, shadowing the sky in light periwinkles and soft lilacs, the brightness of oranges, pinks, and yellows seeping away at the edges of the world. The ocean kept at its steady pace, the tide getting higher as the day wore off from the world, transitioning into dusk. 

Bryce stumbled through the sand as he was carelessly shoved from behind, and he froze when he felt a gun pressed to his back. “In case you get any ideas sweetie.” The sinister voice was dripping with a warning.

He kept his mouth shut as he was steered so that he was facing the pier now, the large wooden platform stretched out further than Bryce had expected into the ocean. He steadied himself as he stepped up onto the wooden platform. His legs were so used to slipping through the sand that it took him a moment.

But he didn’t have a moment, for he was forced to press on. Bryce tried to straighten his back and to hold his head up high as members from his gang and the other one taunted and jeered at him, their words sour and nasty. He kept going on until he reached the end of the pier, where another man was standing. He looked tough,  so unlike the meekness of Bryce, his own arms full of bags as he stood at one side of the platform. 

Bryce felt intimidated by the attention that had been focused in on him, and could feel despair rolling over him in waves as he looked upon the other chosen member from the opposite gang. He didn’t understand why he was thrust into this position in the first place, though he suspected that Travis was testing him. Or just being a dick.

His knees wobbled as everyone stared at him, some from the other gang spitting out vivid remarks and others merely training their weapon so that it was aimed directly at him. The man on the opposing side glowered down at him menacingly. Bryce wasn’t even sure what he was supposed to be doing, he hadn’t been instructed to do anything so he opted to tremble like a deer caught in headlights.

There were too many lingering moments of silence, the tension building up intensely. Bryce finally threw the bag of cash to the ground, not wanting anything to do with it anymore he kicked it across the wooden platform. He was relieved when the other dealer followed suit immediately after. Travis came up from behind Bryce, shoving him to the side as he looked through the bags. Bryce rustled in annoyance as he regained his balance, feeling like a nuisance as Travis counted the money himself. As if he didn’t trust Bryce with it. Yet he had thrown Bryce into the danger zone without hesitation.

Travis nodded to the opposite group in approval, and received a nod back from the man Bryce had initiated the deal with. That must have been the signal for both parties to split up, as everyone started to filter away from the pier with only murmurs and jabs being thrown between each other. Bryce spotted sight of Damien and began making his way towards him as soon as he could, trying to get out of Travis’ view.

He finally caught up with his brother as he had reached the beach, and he tugged onto the sleeve of his jacket desperately in order to get his attention. Damien snapped his head back to look up at Bryce, the look on his face freezing Bryce in place. It was a cold and harsh look, one full of resentment and perhaps even a spark of jealousy.

Bryce stammered over his words, though wasn’t able to piece together anything tangible before the man he so loathed beckoned for him from behind. 

“Bryce, how about you stay with me? No worries Damien, I’ll bring him home for you.” Travis chided, placing himself between Bryce and his brother, though not before a flash of concern was seen in Damien’s eyes as pale fear washed over Bryce’s features.

There was a moment of silence. Most of the other men were on their way out of the area now, the three men left in a seemingly frozen bubble. Bryce held his breath, pleading internally that Damien would see through Travis and make up some kind of excuse for him not to go. Even though Bryce knew deep down that would have no affect on Damien.

Bryce finally opened his mouth to speak when he realized that Travis was toying with the handgun in his back pocket, right where Bryce could see it. He clamped his mouth shut and looked down at the sand, his breathing rigid and irregular as despair rolled through him in waves.

“Alright I guess. You cool with that Bryce?” Damien asked, his eyes trained on Bryce as Travis ever so politely stepped aside. His hand slowly fishing out the gun in his pocket in a teasing manner. His point was obviously made now.

Bryce didn’t look up at Damien, he couldn’t bring himself to as he felt his eyes burn and his vision blur. He knew his body was starting to tremble and he could only hope that it wasn’t too apparent. If Damien noticed, he was sure to be shot in the center of the forehead by Travis. Bryce couldn’t let that happen. He just wouldn’t be able to live with himself after something like that. He barely could now as it was.

His voice was tiny and it shook, but he was able to squeak out, “...Yes I’m sure. Go ahead Damien.”

He could practically see the evil curl of Travis’ lips with those weak words. Bryce noticed with a quiet sigh of relief that the gun was slowly lowered back into Travis’ back pocket. He glanced up underneath his bangs to see Damien still staring at him with a skeptical look, though his brother shrugged and waved at them. “See you later on then.”

Bryce bristled as Damien began trudging through the sand. He stood there behind Travis and watched his brother get farther and farther away from him. He choked on a sob as he was lost to the horizon of the hill that sloped down to where they stood at the bottom of the beach. For some reason, he had been holding onto an ignite of hope that Damien would save him. That he would defeat Travis and get Bryce home without another horrific incident. He was so stupid for thinking such a silly thing.

A few minutes passed before Travis finally turned around to face Bryce. He hadn’t been expecting such an immediate attack, so was shocked when Travis was suddenly leaning forward with a tight grip on the back of Bryce’s hair, brutally kissing him and shoving his tongue down his throat. Practically slobbering all over Bryce’s chin as he violated him. Bryce whimpered in fear and pain, attempting to pull away before the grip in his hair was sharply tightened.

Travis pulled away with a cruel look in his eyes as he looked down at Bryce. “Oh how I missed you. My little pet. I got a little surprise for you today Bryce dear.”

Bryce wavered in between reality and another space he couldn’t quite define. Again, though this time he was much more aware of it. His vision blurred and his head spun as chaos ensued his entire being. He didn’t understand what was happening, it was as if he wasn’t really there when he clearly was. Horror had an iron grip on his mentality, and Bryce began to feel his brain shutting down. As if it were attempting to be blind for what was to come, so he could cope easier. 

He felt himself being tugged up the hill, his feet acting to their own accord as they stumbled through the sand. Bryce felt faint as he looked up to see who was tugging him, and felt sick all over again when he saw Travis looking down at him with a gentle and yet harsh expression. He had forgotten in such a short amount of time where he was. Who he was with. What was going to happen.

There was a truck before him, and Bryce shuffled away from it as Travis opened the passenger door for him. Bryce stared at the step to the seat in confusion before a sharp slap to his face momentarily brought him back.

Travis was speaking, and the distant voice was briefly too loud as he shouted, “Get in the fucking car Bryce! Before I smack you again, you bitch!”

Bryce nodded absently as he heaved himself up the step and slid into the seat. His brain was having a hard time keeping up, his memories fading as soon as they were made. A few moments of silence felt like an eternity. It was as if he were high or dosed, though he knew what this really was. 

It was his mind’s way of coping with a traumatic experience. He knew now what was to come and his brain was trying to stop any other bad things from entering. He was disassociating, his mind detaching itself from Bryce in order to handle whatever was to come better.

And Bryce didn’t know how to stop it. He felt trapped in his own mind as he watched the trees whizz past the car in a blur. He still saw everything, though it was as if he were just watching a movie. He had control over his own body, but it was in such an unfamiliar and strange way…

“...planned everything out. Got a place set up for us and everything. More videos should be fun to make. Just for you and me of course. We’ll figure this out, we can get you away from those nasty boys that you let toy around with you. You can stay with me, how does that sound?”

He shook his head sluggishly, before he was shaking it fervently, trying to regain his own senses. It helped a little bit, though left him a little dizzy. 

“What?” Travis leered with danger leaking in his voice.

Bryce looked directly at Travis, his vision slowly focusing. He could feel himself be shoved forward in his mind, no longer sitting aside but at the controls. “N-No. I don’t want that. I don’t want you. I don’t want anything to do with you.” His voice trembled, but it grounded him slightly. 

Bryce felt his stomach coil tightly when suddenly Travis was yanking the steering wheel until they were sitting at the edge of the very empty road. His reflexes were still slow from the dreamlike episode he had just experienced, but Bryce managed to pull away from Travis as he brought a fist to his face. Bryce yelped, and then cried out when Travis tackled Bryce into the passenger seat, pinning him down and glaring down at him. Travis’ face was contorted into something dark and sinister, eyes flashing with rage and his scowl deepened.

“Don’t you dare speak to me like that! It doesn’t matter what you want Bryce, haven’t you figured that out? Did you forget our last session? Has it really been too long for you? Do I have to teach you your damned place one again? I will do what I want with you, and I don’t give a fuck about what you want or don’t want. You little slut!” 

The words were venomous and were soaked with toxic implications. Bryce looked up with wide fearful eyes as Travis huffed down at him in bursts of heated anger. He had forgotten. But he wanted so badly to fight back, to beat this evil man once and for all. 

But the threats lingered. And they were spoken again now, in a hushed voice, “I found out their names. I know everything about them all. I will beat Jonathan to a pulp, scar his face up until it’s unrecognizable. I’d like to gouge out Ryan’s pretty eyes, maybe smash my knife into them until they are nothing but pools of blood. His brain rotting beneath the blade. Slice away at Luke’s tongue and shove the blade deep into his throat. Hah, rape them all right before your very eyes. And it would be all your fault. I mean, they never wanted this. They never asked for this. They’d be dying at your hand in reality. It wouldn’t even be me torturing and raping them. It would be  _ you _ Bryce.”

The words were too much, the imagery was too detailed and deep. Bryce felt terror exploding in his core at them. At the scenes that unfolded in his mind. The trauma and the pain. The whimpers of pain, and the screams of those he loved dearly. Bitter tears washed over his face and he shook his head, a pathetic sound mewling from his lips as he shuddered beneath the other man’s body.

A triumphant smirk crawled over Travis’ features. “So then, will you be cooperating with me, my little Bryce?” 

Bryce recoiled at the hand that caressed his cheek gently, but froze in place to stop himself. He bit harshly down onto his lower lip, his eyes locked with Travis’ as he slowly nodded. His mind in a whirl of chaos and anger and fear. All his emotions consuming him internally as outside he tried to detach himself from this. 

It didn’t work when he wanted it to though. 

 

\---

 

Bryce shouldn’t have been as surprised by the house Travis pulled up to as he was. He blinked for a moment as he looked up at the modern two story home in awe, wondering silently where they were. A variety of grey and beige stones made up the outside of the house, a dark oak flat roof peered over the edges of the top of the house. Instead of large and open windows that these style of houses typically had, there were vertical and narrow windows that symmetrically mirrored each other, all of which were lined with the same dark oak. 

The tires bumped over a pebbled driveway, and Bryce looked around warily at the foliage that filled the front yard heftily. Despite the house being on top of a hill and out in the open, it was still very private. He felt his nerves get the best of him as Travis finally stopped the car outside the house, twisting the key in the ignition until the truck settled down. Bryce kept his head down, the words that had been spat at him before turning over in his mind time and time again. The horrific visuals of what would come to those he loved if he dared step out of line haunted him. 

“Come on, get out of the car and follow me. You better not try to pull anything, you know the consequences if you do.” Travis spoke, his voice firm yet gentle. Bryce didn’t understand this man still, but he didn’t question it. He merely nodded and fumbled out of the passenger seat.

Bryce swayed in place, feeling light headed already. He shakily followed Travis up to the house, carefully taking the steps up to the tiny porch and standing outside a dark narrow door that matched the windows and roof. 

“This is my house,” Travis informed Bryce as he opened the door to the house. Bryce heard the sneer in his voice as he continued to speak, “Soon it will be yours too, wouldn’t that be nice?”

Bryce bit down on his lip harshly as he followed the other man into the house, tensing up as the door was locked from behind him. The lights were flicked on, and Bryce was surprised to see that the lights were warm rather than bright and blinding. The entire house was actually. 

The front entrance was short lived, as they were soon entering an open floored area where the living room and kitchen practically merged with one another. The walls were a beige color, the floors a dusted brown, and the furniture shared the same dark wooden oak theme as the outside of the house had reflected. The living room consisted of dark and comfortable looking couch sitting before a flat screen TV that hung on the wall, a matching coffee table resting between the two snugly. The kitchen’s counters were topped off by dark grey granite, and a small dining bar rested at the end of the kitchen, with three stools settled beneath the overhang of that counter. A black fridge and stove complimented the dark themes of the counters along with the light walls. 

There was another small area at the end of all of this that held a spiral staircase that led to the second floor. Bryce followed with jittery movements and could only pray that they weren’t headed towards those stairs. Bryce nearly ran right into Travis before they could reach it however, as the other man had stopped in his tracks. Travis slowly turned around to face Bryce, cupping his jaw in his loose grasp as he looked down at him. 

“You’re all mine now,” Travis growled out, before pressing his lips against Bryce’s already bruised ones greedily. Bryce yelped in surprise, especially when Travis pushed him back against the wall behind him roughly, his hand snaking through his hair and yanking it, while the other traveled low down to Bryce’s butt. Bryce squirmed uncomfortably and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling nauseous as Travis stuck his tongue deeply down his throat. The taste of Travis was nothing at all like his lovers. It wasn’t sweet and chaste, it wasn’t genuine and loving. It was diabolical and it was grungy, it was selfish and spiteful. 

He jumped when Travis’ hand grabbed at his behind frantically, and he allowed himself to open his eyes, disgusted to see how heated and impatient Travis’ face looked. The man’s eyes were screwed shut as his eyebrows were furrowed down, moaning deeply as he invaded Bryce’s mouth, almost with an angry passion. 

Bryce finally felt like he could breathe when Travis yanked his head back, staring down at Bryce as he gasped for air. He didn’t have too much time before suddenly Travis was hoisting Bryce up into the air. He gasped and flailed as Travis let him hover for a moment, and in blind panic for some sort of grounding, Bryce wrapped his legs around Travis’ hips.

Just as suddenly, Travis was turning around rapidly, and heading over to the stairs. Bryce whimpered pathetically as he allowed himself to be carried. He knew that if he did anything to upset Travis too much, that those serious threats would be carried. Travis would find a way and go through with them he was sure. After all, he was the leader of a gang, he had a lot of power compared to Bryce. Bryce was a nobody in comparison.

They were at the top of the stairs now, and Travis was turning into a narrow hallway. Bryce felt panic bursting in his chest as terrible thoughts began to prey on his already weakened mentality. He held his breath, not trusting himself to breathe in case the breaths were labored. In case one breath of air was all it took for him to shamble. He held onto the breath like an anchor as a door behind him opened. He didn’t want to let go as the door was loudly shut behind him, or when it was locked with a key that Travis had.

The breath was knocked out of him when he was thrown precariously onto the bed like a rag doll. Bryce looked up to see the soft glow of lights casting down onto him. He sat up cautiously, and was surprised to see that the bedroom looked fairly ordinary. The walls were hued with a warm orange color, boarded with a dark wood. The bed had deep blue coverings on it, creamy white pillows and sheets complimenting the colors. There was even an end table on each side of the bed, one of which had a digital alarm clock and phone charger on it. A dresser stood against one of the wall, and dark red curtains hid the room from the rest of the world. 

It was all normal, until Bryce spotted a camera set up on a tripod across from the bed. He froze as he looked back at his reflection in the lenses. And behind that camera, was something even more terrifying. A wall filled with strange instruments, weapons, and toys that Bryce was sure he could not name. It was clear that the wall was a panel, that there was some way for Travis to adjust it so that it was hidden from the unsuspecting eye. Lights were cast down upon the wall, causing the metal objects to glint at Bryce across the room, as if they were mocking him. His eyes caught particularly to the same collar and muzzle he had worn last time, and his stomach twisted uncomfortably as fear rained down upon him all at once. 

This was really going to happen again. Bryce could do nothing to stop it, he could only hope that something happened before Travis could do anything to him. He felt tears pricking at his eyes as Travis moved behind the camera with a menacing smile plastered on his face, his eyes flickering with excitement as he set up the camera.

“Can you say hello to the camera for me today Brycey?” Travis spoke soothingly, a knowing smirk playing on his lips.

Bryce felt his heart freeze as he looked up at the camera with wide eyes. He wanted to shout at Travis, wanted to scream and beg for help. But he knew it didn’t matter. He knew that he couldn’t in the end. So he just nodded and in the tiniest voice said, “...Hello.”

“Now,” Travis crooned with a mischievous tone in his voice, “I want to make sure that you are okay baby. So, you are giving me your consent to do this right? You want to do this… Right?” From behind the camera, Travis was glaring at him, his eyes saying all that was unspoken.  _ If you don’t say yes, then you know what will happen. _ Terror burned in Bryce’s veins, tears were bitterly breaking free, and his entire body was trembling against his will. But he cast his eyes down and nodded.

A soft, “Yes,” passing his lips. Yes. Because he was going to protect his brother, his lovers. Yes, because if this is what he had to do in order to do just that, then so be it. Yes. Because if he could keep those he cared for safe then he would do it in a heartbeat. He wasn’t consenting to Travis doing these horrible things to him, but he was consenting to keeping everyone around him safe.

Travis’ face warped into one full of twisted power and eagerness. His smile curled evilly upon his face, his eyes growing dark as he looked down at Bryce. “Brycey baby, I want you to strip for me…  _ Slowly _ dear.”

Bryce bit down on his lower lip harshly, knowing that Travis was getting a kick out of using him in such a way, humiliating him. But the vivid threats from earlier still hung clearly in his mind, so Bryce nodded and sluggishly began taking off his shirt. 

Bryce froze when Travis pointedly cleared his throat, “ _ Slow  _ and  _ sexy _ Bryce, I know you must have that in you.”

He grit his teeth together, but made more of an effort to appear more seductive. Even if awkwardly so, his face heating up in embarrassment as he finally yanked the shirt off of his head. His movements stiff and jittery, his legs shaking as he began to stand up on the bed (as Travis was gesturing for him to do from behind the camera).

Bryce gradually pulled his jeans off, feeling himself tremble as he knew that soon enough he would be in horrible pain. He would be violated in unthinkable ways and be stripped away of whatever dignity he may have left. Bryce managed to take a deep breath as he pulled the jeans off completely, left standing only in his briefs.

He froze in place, feeling fearful and vulnerable as he stood there nearly nude. Knowing what the next step would be. Bryce was just about to start sliding his underwear off when Travis spoke up, “No no, sweetie. I want you to touch yourself before you take those off.”

Bryce’s face turned beet red at that, and he shook his head a tiny bit before he caught sight of Travis. Travis was rubbing at his groin and had a sick smile on his face as he watched Bryce. His smile was wide and menacing, his eyes clearly spoke without him saying a word.  _ Or else _ .

So Bryce clumsily began to feel himself through the fabric of his briefs, he felt tears stinging at the corners of his eyes as his body became aroused at the friction. He hated this, he felt shameful and loathsome. His eyes were red and teary as he looked spitefully at the camera, he didn’t know why Travis had that at all. Other than to just send Bryce videos in order to make him feel more disgusting. Though Travis asking if Bryce consented to this made it clear that other people may watch this. Or maybe they already were, that thought alone was enough to make Bryce freeze as a sick feeling gurgled in his stomach. 

“Alright alright,” Travis spoke with a sneer and a clear hard on in his jeans. Though Bryce realized that he had gotten hard as well, and he felt a wave of self disgust as he realized that. “Bryce, lie down on your back for me.”

Bryce shook as he nodded and slowly brought himself to lie down on the bed, looking up at the ceiling and lights that were casted over him. He whimpered when Travis appeared above him, his weight shifting the bed awkwardly as he kneeled over Bryce. That smug smile still clear as day on his face. 

He yelped when suddenly his briefs were yanked off of him without warning. Bryce squirmed when he felt Travis’ thick hand wrap itself around him, his breath hitched as his body responded to the touch positively. 

“I told you this time I wasn’t going to be so selfish, I want you to enjoy this too.” Travis spoke lowly. Bryce squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head before stopping himself. He didn’t want this, of course he didn’t, but he knew that it would only be worse for him and for those he loved if he didn’t oblige. So he nodded a tiny bit.

Travis must have been pleased by that, as he murmured out, “Good boy, Brycey.” He could feel Travis’ hot breath on him, and before he realized what was happening, he suddenly felt himself being engulfed by the other man. The wet heat sending his troublesome thoughts to lay by the wayside as pleasure overtook his senses. 

Bryce began to involuntarily thrust his hips up as Travis began to suck, heat pooled at his stomach quicker than he’d like to admit. Inside he was a wreck, guilt and shame flooding him as his body enjoyed every moment of this. But outside, he could care less as his body felt electrified with each teasing swipe of the tongue, every time teeth scraped across the sensitive skin. 

It didn’t take long at all before Bryce completely let go, he heard a pop and suddenly felt cold as bliss came out in hot white sheets across his own body. He sunk into the bed, feeling all the tension from before melt away. He wondered faintly why he had even been so wound up in the first place. 

It wasn’t until he felt another mouth on his own, and tasted his own saltiness, that he remembered where he was. Bryce’s eyes flew open as he looked up at Travis, who had pulled away and was now smiling softly down at Bryce. He felt all that tension coil tightly around his body again.

Travis brought a hand up to Bryce’s face, and he gently weaved his fingers through his hair as he looked down at him with almost an adoring look in his eyes. “Shh, see? It’s alright. I told you that you would enjoy it.” Bryce closed his eyes, feeling the hot tears streaming down his face before he registered that they were even in his eyes at all, “Awh, sweetie, don’t cry. I didn’t want you to cry yet. Not this time. You did really good, and I promise that I’ll let you enjoy yourself again if you’re a good boy.”

Bryce stifled down a sob, looking up at Travis with a blurry vision. He said in a faint voice, “Please don’t- I don’t want to feel good… I-I don’t deserve it.”

“Yes you do baby,” Travis hummed sweetly, “If we’re going to make this work, then you have to get a little too.” Bryce bit his own tongue as the other man continued to speak, “That’s why I love you, you are so selfless. So pure and beautiful. So unlike the other filth I’ve tried dating. You are the perfect specimen Bryce.”

Travis pecked at Bryce’s lips tenderly before rising back up. Bryce felt sick to the core as he went through every twisted word that Travis had spoken. A lot of that were things that his own lovers would have whispered to him late at night. Something that Jonathan would have faintly muttered as they cuddled up on the couch. Or that Luke might have said after they had just had sex and were coming down from the heat of everything. Maybe something Ryan had said when they were both awake at night and their other lovers were asleep.

Confusion washed over him as he slowly sat up, but the tears were still there. The fear still engulfed him. He still didn’t want this. But it was clear that as twisted as Travis was, and how in the wrong the man was, there was some level of real love and care from him that Bryce didn’t understand at all. His infatuation ran too deeply and was too demanding. But there was something that was truly there. Maybe in another world, where Travis knew how to treat people right and knew what consent was, maybe Bryce might have returned those feelings.

But the fact of the matter was that Travis had raped him. Travis had brutally humiliated him and had become a mental toll on Bryce. Even if he had just pleased Bryce (against his will) he had still done something unforgivable. He had threatened Bryce unapologetically. He had claimed that Bryce was  _ his _ . Which Bryce had never even allowed those closest to him to do, as he had always thought that was toxic in a relationship.

Clarity flooded Bryce once more, he grounded himself and took a deep breath in order to control himself. He couldn’t lash out now. He couldn’t get angry. He still felt afraid. But at least he knew where he stood, and he knew that Travis was the one in the wrong.

He knew.

 

\---

 

“Get onto your stomach.” Travis’ sharp voice snapped Bryce back to reality. He was yanked away from his own thoughts as he looked at Travis with wide eyes. He held a variety of items in his hands. He hadn’t even noticed that Travis had gotten them, from the wall before him no doubt. 

Bryce hesitated, eyes wide as he looked at the cluttered things that Travis held. He felt his body freeze up with fear as he wondered what the hell Travis would be doing to him this time. The memories from the last time flashed through his mind with clarity, and he couldn’t help the gritting of his teeth or the trembling in his bones. 

“ _ Now! _ ” Travis snapped, his patience thin. The shift had happened once again, and Travis seemed like an entirely different person. He was much more brash and demanding, not hesitating at all to demean Bryce. 

Bryce obeyed, turning away from Travis and sinking down onto his stomach, folding his arms securely underneath his chest as he tried not to think about how vulnerable he was. How screwed up this entire situation was. 

He cried out when he felt Travis yank his arms from underneath him, and twist them until they were both behind him. Bryce harshly bit down on his lower lip as he felt the now familiar feeling of leather being wrapped around his forearms. He squeezed his eyes shut when the metallic sound of buckles clipped together, and he felt his arms being bound tightly in a straight line behind his back. 

“It’s okay baby,” Travis murmured as he finished off what Bryce assumed was some kind of weird arm bondage item. His breath hitched as the collar was wrapped around his neck and was adjusted a bit too tightly. Just enough to be too uncomfortable. 

When the muzzle was put on, Bryce could feel full on panic set in, and he started to squirm from underneath Travis, feeling stifled from his weight, from the lack of movement he was allowed. Anxiety filled his entire being as he realized just how trapped he really was. He could hardly move his arms at all, his shoulders were twisted at an awkward angle which ached. The muzzle was fully put on, and just like the collar, it was just tight enough to be painful. Bryce tried with blind panic to move again, though merely ended up thrashing his legs uselessly as he writhed his upper body in desperation. 

“Feeling trapped?” Travis growled out, getting off of Bryce and standing aside. Bryce took the opportunity to try and lift himself up, though it was more difficult than it seemed as he had been lying completely flat on the bed and was now unable to get his upper body to lift up. “Ahem, as much fun as it is to see you squirm, I’d like you do behave tonight Brycey. For your loved ones’ sakes, remember?”

Bryce stilled at those words, tension freezing his body as he tried again to breathe through the panic. He nodded stupidly, reminding himself why he had obliged in the first place. He had to stay strong for them, had to keep on a brave face. At least.. For now. There had to be some kind of way out of this, right? This couldn’t last forever surely. 

He heard a belt being unbuckled, and other shuffling from behind him. He knew that Travis was undressing, and he could only hope that he wasn’t going to be as rough with him as last time. Bryce was still aching and in horrible pain from then, and he didn’t want to imagine how terrible his body would feel after a second round of this. He shuddered and tried to ready himself for the inevitable.

Travis got onto the bed behind him, and lifted his butt into the air, forcing Bryce to arch his back until he was nearly presenting himself to the man. Bryce whimpered pathetically, his legs wobbled as he held himself up, and he felt them being moved apart so that he was more spread out. Humiliation flooded him, though that was no surprise to Bryce anymore. One of Travis’ hands were placed firmly onto his hips while the other reached over to Bryce’s hair, gripping onto it. Just shy of harsh. 

His entire body was tense, and Bryce tried desperately to relax so that it wouldn’t be as painful, but it felt like the more he tried the worse it got. Within moments, Travis was jamming himself into Bryce’s hole with no mercy. Grunting loudly as he stuffed himself into Bryce, who felt as if he was being torn in two. Bryce cried out, though whatever sounds were milked out of him was muffled by the stupid muzzle that he had been forced to wear. 

Slurs and profanities were dripped out from Travis as he fully entered, then brutally yanked out just to slam himself back in. “Such a good boy- So tight- I could do this- Ah- Forever you know.” He said between pants and moans.

Bryce wished he could just stop existing, he wanted to turn off that switch in his head again and just let go. But he felt so set in reality that this horrifying truth of what was happening to him again was set in stone in his mind. Horrible pain shot through his body as he was thrust into, as the fingers in his hair clawed into his scalp and tightened around the locks of hair. Bryce struggled to keep his head up, but it was slammed down by Travis immediately after. 

He fell into full hysteria as he realized that Travis wasn’t letting him lift his head at all, his face stuffed into the mattress so harshly that he couldn’t get a breath in. His nose was being smashed into it painfully. Bryce struggled underneath the death grip, though wasn’t able to do much as he was being completely handled otherwise. Bryce became frantic, trying desperately to let Travis know that he was completely constricting anyway of Bryce breathing. A frenzy of pure panic and distress flooded him as he felt himself begin to feel faint, his lungs burning with need-

Finally Travis yanked his head back completely, his movements stopping abruptly. Bryce gasped uncontrollably, trying to get as much air in as he could in fear of being shoved back down. It took him a few moments to realize that Travis wasn’t even moving behind him, just holding his head up. His fingers weren’t even in his hair now, but his hands were both set firmly on his shoulders from behind him. 

“Bryce-” Travis spoke quietly, an unsettled quaver in his voice, “You- You went limp there for a second… Are you- Are you okay?” 

Bryce shook his head feverishly as he continued to breathe deeply, steadying the pace now that he knew that Travis wasn’t going to be stuffing his face into the mattress. He tried to say something before realizing he still had the muzzle on, and frustratedly cried out instead. 

Travis gently pulled out from behind, and relief flooded Bryce at the loss of feeling so overly full. He wanted to collapse into the bed, but instead felt himself being turned around until he was lying on his back, his arms still bound together behind him.  He looked up at Travis with teary eyes, and was shocked to see that the man actually looked fully concerned, his eyebrows furrowed together and his mouth slightly open with shock. 

“I didn’t mean to…” Travis whispered, just barely audible. Bryce felt a flutter in his stomach as he realized that Travis was actually worried about him. Though his thoughts turned bitter as he realized he was probably only worried because then he wouldn’t have a play thing anymore. 

The resentment must have shown on his face, because suddenly Travis looked crushed. It was such an unexpected expression that Bryce was taken aback, left questioning himself once more. “I’m really sorry- I really didn’t mean to- I could have  _ killed _ you Bryce. I didn’t even realize it baby. I’m so sorry. I love you so much, you know that?” Travis spoke gently, cupping his hand on Bryce’s cheeks passionately, his eyes so warm and his face so full of guilt… It was almost believable. 

Flustered and confused feelings coursed through Bryce again, and he shook his head, anger taking whatever other emotions were there. Travis didn’t deserve any of the sympathy that he was begging for, he didn’t deserve to be treated like he had made a simple mistake when he was so consciously hurting Bryce before that. When he had so easily made such horrific threats.

Travis looked hurt, and he was speaking once again, though Bryce suddenly found that his body was limp with exhaustion, and his mind was slowly falling into the same fatigue. Bryce let the anger slide away quietly, and he let the memories fog up as slumber called to him. The sight of Travis faded away into darkness and the noises around him became muffled… All sense of danger and anxiety were slipping away, and soon his world plummeted into nothingness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was 27 pages long... LEGIT... THANKS TO MY BETA YISHY AS ALWAYS BTW SHE WAS AMAZING SUPPORT. :3
> 
> Also- "I found out their names. I know everything about them all. I will beat Jonathan to a pulp, scar his face up until it’s unrecognizable. I’d like to gouge out Ryan’s pretty eyes, maybe smash my knife into them until they are nothing but pools of blood. His brain rotting beneath the blade. Slice away at Luke’s tongue and shove the blade deep into his throat. Hah, rape them all right before your very eyes. And it would be all your fault. I mean, they never wanted this. They never asked for this. They’d be dying at your hand in reality. It wouldn’t even be me torturing and raping them. It would be you Bryce.” 
> 
> Favorite thing ever. I GET THE CHILLS READING THAT. HOW DID I WRITE IT???? I am so sorry. SO. SORRY. The next part... Not much better. In fact a lot worse in a lot of ways. But. Also a lot better. ^.^;;
> 
> Love you all as always. Leave a kudo and maybe a comment if you feel up to it and would like to give me feedback. (Also just a PSA I need a grammar tense Beta because I switch on that sO MANY TIMES IDK WHY)

**Author's Note:**

> That was intense. It just gets worse from here on. I do promise a Happy Ending™ (I NEED TO STOP WITH THE ™ DON'T I?)™
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this regardless. I will try and update this weekly. There will only be three parts, and perhaps even an epilogue. This was seriously supposed to be a oneshot, but I always let dark shit get out of hand.
> 
> Please feel free to kudos and comment and such! 
> 
> C:


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